Approach avoidance dating 2 year dating anniversary present
Fortunately, most people have a secure attachment, because it favors survival.It ensures that we’re safe and can help each other in a dangerous environment.The result is that the cheater delays making any decision – often indefinitely – and may only make a final decision when either the betrayed spouse or the affair partner insists.This is not to suggest that an ultimatum should be given, as they often backfire, but it’s smart for the betrayed spouse to clarify that he/she also has a decision to make, and that the future of their relationship is not just up to the cheater.
Quite often the person having an affair doesn’t really have a clue of what they want to do following the discovery of their affair.
All they know is that they don’t want to face the fallout that comes with making a choice.
After all, in the mind of a cheater, there are less than desirable consequences regardless of the decision they make.
You’re also responsive to those of your partner and try to meet your partner’s needs. To maintain a positive connection, you give up your needs to please and accommodate your partner in.
Because you have good self-esteem, you don’t take things personally and aren’t reactive to criticism. Instead, you de-escalate them by problem-solving, forgiving, and apologizing. But because you don’t get your needs met, you become unhappy.